Individual, Couples and Relationship Counselling in Crouch End near Finsbury Park, Peterborough and Online
Following government rules on social distancing, I am able to offer counselling sessions online, or by telephone. Counselling can help you to feel less isolated, as we live through through these difficult times. I participate in the Key Workers Counselling programme with the National Counselling Society, where reduced counselling fees apply.
I'm Thalia Martin, a skilled counsellor with 25 years experience in mental health. I have a Diploma in Therapeutic Counselling, and have completed the Open Dialogue Foundation Training. I'm an accredited member of the National Counselling Society, and follow their code of ethics. I've worked as a counsellor for Cambridgeshire Consultancy in Counselling, and for Counselling Initiatives in Haringey, and worked for many years in the voluntary sector for mental health.
I work with individuals and couples experiencing problems in the following areas, among others:
My approach is to treat you as a unique individual, with your own experience, understanding and potential to grow. If you've never seen a counsellor before and don't know what to expect, it can seem like a big step to take. I'll help you to feel at ease, and explain how counselling works.
As well as individual counselling, I offer relationship and couples counselling in Crouch End, near Finsbury Park, and Peterborough. Coming to counselling as a couple gives both of you some valuable time to reflect on your relationship, with an independent person present. This can lead to a greater understanding of the issues that bring you to counselling, and your relationship as a whole. This approach can also be applied between friends, and family members. For couples counselling, I offer longer sessions of 1 hour and 20 minutes. This gives more time for both of you to talk, making a change of perspective more likely.
I provide a confidential, supportive environment, where you can explore your thoughts and feelings without being judged. Whether you are looking for open-ended or short-term counselling, my aim as a counsellor is to help you to live your life in a more fulfilling way. Together we can work on finding a way forward for you.
Short-term counselling can help you to deal with a specific problem, and can be very useful. Open-ended counselling is an opportunity to look at things in more depth, to explore underlying themes in your life that are affecting long-term or recurring issues.
You can find out more about my approach, qualifications, training, experience, couples work, and fees on the other pages of my website. If you think I could help you, please contact me by phone or email to find out more. If you decide to arrange an introductory session, we can talk about what you'd like to get from counselling, and how we could work together.
Counselling in Crouch End is based at the Haelan Centre, 41 The Broadway, Crouch End, London N8 8DT – convenient for Finsbury Park, Harringay and Hornsey – click here to see it on the map.
My work as a counsellor in central Peterborough is based at 16 Crawthorne Road, Peterborough PE1 4AB – convenient for Stamford, Whittlesey, March, and the Deepings also – click here to see where it is. There is metered parking outside the building.
Thanks to Paul Thoma for his photographs.
Conversation between people who disagree with each other
I've seen plenty of conversations between people who agree with each other, on the internet. What is rarer, I think, is to see an extended conversation between two people who disagree about most things. I've just watched one, and it was inspiring to see them talk for over an hour, willing to listen to each other, and also express their own ideas honestly. Something new and hopeful comes out of a dialogue between them.
What has been your experience of coronavirus and lockdown?
People's experiences of coronavirus and lockdown have been very varied in the past few weeks. Perhaps you have had more time than usual to reflect on your life, and relationships. Maybe you have been busier than ever, working in very stressful conditions, and haven't had time to stop and think. Maybe you have been ill, or worried about money. Whatever your experience, this crisis has highlighted how much we depend on each other, and can help each other.
Can Counselling Make You Happy?
Most of us would like to be happy all the time, or at least more of the time. What counselling can do is help you find your own meaning to life, and a better understanding of your relationships. This provides greater contentment and satisfaction, helping you to get through the difficult times, and enjoy the good times.
TV Detectives are Great Listeners
I've noticed that TV detective Montalbano and his colleague are great listeners. Amidst the carnage that provides the plot for each episode, Inspector Montalbano and his assistant Fazio spend a lot of time with the people involved. They slow things down, give their full attention, and offer the person being interviewed plenty of time to tell their story. They're the best listeners I've seen on TV. I have no idea if real detectives work like that, but it reminds me a bit of what I do as a counsellor. I'm not trying to solve crimes, but to give each client my full attention, and the time to tell their own story.
Civilization and Its Discontents
Sigmund Freud wrote this towards the end of his career, and it can be seen as an assessment of his life's work in a social and historical context. What stands out for me is the way he crashed through taboos about subjects people found hard to talk about in his lifetime. Maybe there are just as many taboos today. He was certainly brave, in questioning deeply held assumptions of "civilized" societies. He opened things up for discussion, and showed how attending to the details of an individual's life can be therapeutic. Freud believed that the values required to hold society together come at a cost to individuals, and I can't help thinking that he's talking about his own discontent as much as anyone else's. In this book, he doesn't choose whether the results of civilization are good or bad overall – but it's a great discussion.
Sanity, Madness and the Family
This book was written by two British psychiatrists, RD Laing and Aaron Esterson. It's based on interviews with families where one member has been identified as schizophrenic. Their aim is to show that the experiences of people with a diagnosis of schizophrenia make sense, in the context of their family relationships and society. The interviews they conducted with family members show how confusing such relationships can be. It's a fascinating book.